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Dear Future Husband: A Grown Woman’s Thoughts on Dating

I don’t necessarily want to know what college you went to and what degree you obtained, I need to know if you can communicate in good and bad times in the wee hours of the morning and late at night, about things that matter.

I don’t care how many S550s, Bugatti’s, BMW M6 special edition cars you have, what your 401K balance is or where you go for vacation; I need to know if you will be there when I call, to make sure I’m OK. I need to know if your word is “bond”, if I can trust you to protect my heart and if you care enough to be fully present when we spend time.

I’m no longer impressed by titles and the extras after your name, (Dr. MA, Ph.d, VP, or President of so and so- I’ve dated them). I need to know if you are kind and affectionate, if you will care for me if I become sick and pray for me when I can’t pray for myself.

I need to know what makes you feel alive, your fears and your back story. I want to know the parts of you, you’ve never told anyone. I need to know how you treat your Mama, your kids, and those you say you love.

I don’t need to hear another promise, or necessarily be told how beautiful I am (though that is always nice ), I need to know that you see my inner being, my scars and stretch-marks and the beauty and grace of my soul and in my story.

I don’t need to spend weekend after weekend on another pointless date hanging out with you at the “spot” or making love without purpose or meaning (that’s something I don’t need to practice, I’m good at that); I need to know what you want to do and where you want to go…with us.

I don’t really care how much “swag” you have, how many Purple Label fine suits you can pull out of the closet, or how many Gucci driving loafers and silk ties you can rock on any given day. I need to know who you are when I am not looking and who you are when I am.

Your fine-ness, collegiate accomplishments, snazzy cars, credit score and dollars in your bank are icing on the cake-of-you. If the rest of the above is missing, we won’t make it.

Let me love you, laugh with you, be with you and move towards eternity with you. That’s where this grown woman is today.

 

by Rhonda E. Frost

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4 thoughts on “Dear Future Husband: A Grown Woman’s Thoughts on Dating

  1. James Brady says:

    Hi Rhonda I follow you on fb. You are a great writer. I just want to tell you how wonderful your thoughts are on love. I am that way with my wife. I sincerely hope you can find someone to share your soul/life with.

    • Hi James, thank you for reaching out and thank you for following me here. I so appreciate that. I am glad you enjoy reading what I write. I write what touches my heart or what I am feeling at the moment. I look forward to having someone to share my life with one day soon. Best to you! Please stay in touch!

  2. Lacy DeBerry says:

    Rhonda,
    Thanks for clarifying the mind of a great woman. You are a wonderful lady, and a good man would be fortunate to have your love.

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