By Rhonda E. Frost
Dear Lieutenant B., (the lawyers have your full name, as does the Georgia Bureau of Investigation so I won’t put it here).
Whatever the culture is at Fort Valley State University (FVSU) for men(young and old) sexually harassing and sexually assaulting women, or whatever other perversions you have going on, #timesup. The cat is out of the bag.
I spoke to my grand-daughter (…) some weeks ago. She called me from her dorm at FVSU. She spoke with me on this particular day to share some things that happened to her there at school; some things that she was troubled by and felt she needed to tell me about. She had already spoken to her mom Shanae, but she wanted to share it with me as well. My grand-daughter also sent me 4 or 5 audio clips of conversations that she needed me to hear. They were conversations between you and her. I listened to every single one of them. The more I listened, the more enraged and disgusted I became! We talked at great lengths about you, your position of power, what you admitted to about previous interactions with young women, and, we talked about how she felt.
My daughter Shanae talks about it more in detail here, in this FB video post.
I was in shock hearing the things you wanted to do to her 18-year-old-body, and stunned at the quid pro quo language used; not to mention the overt manner in which you attempted to accost her and have her sign on to your sexual relationship plan. You are there on campus to “protect and serve” the young people, not to violate them. The fact that you encouraged her to keep it “secret”, said so much. It sounded child-molester-ish. It also sounded like you knew that what you were doing was wrong.
Because of your actions, she has been thrust into the #MeToo movement, without even trying or knowing. And guess what? Your secrets aren’t safe. They won’t be tucked away and managed quietly. You picked the wrong time in history and the wrong college student.
I could only imagine what this had to be like for her, facing a grown ass man (someone my age, 50-ish); I can only imagine what she felt and thought while hearing your pornographic comments. She’s an 18-year-old college freshman and you are a campus law enforcement supervisor! Talk about an imbalance of power!
Here’s a little backstory for you, on my granddaughter and I~
“She” is my first-born grandchild. She’s my baby. I’ve been there her whole life. I’ve watched over her, as grandma’s do, from a distance and up close. I attended almost every track meet she participated in throughout high-school. I’ve attended her plays, award ceremonies, and birthday parties; and I watched her grow up. I was at her high-school graduation and drove to FVSU with my daughter Shanae, to take her to her dorm. What that means is, we are close. And what that means for you is, I/we will be relentless in this situation against you. This was not supposed to be part of her college experience!
What the f*ck were you thinking?
Perhaps you got hyped after watching 70-year-old Bob Johnson wed his 37-year-old grad student. Or maybe you got all in your feelings about 45-year-old Idris Elba proposing to his 29-year-old girlfriend and you started thinking, maybe you too could get a young girl. Your perverted sexual mind and pathetic real life, just led you astray-with your country ignorant ass! You should have asked somebody or used your police “background check” technology to check us out first. We are your worst nightmare.
I bet you didn’t even consider that she would tell her family. I bet you were so excited at the prospect of sleeping with her, that you didn’t envision this day. I would also bet you are a repeat offender. After all, you are a law enforcement officer on a college campus filled with young, vulnerable black women.
It matters not what your thoughts were when you decided my grand-daughter would be the next victim; your latest toy. But your failure to think with the head that’s in your skull, rather than the head of your penis, has put you in the limelight and front and center in the Shanae Hall and Rhonda Frost family. And the show has only just begun. You are about to be famous. If you would have taken your penis out of your ass, and actually took a few moments to check out her family as much as you were checking out her young body parts, you would have known who we were, and you would have gleaned that “she” comes from a family of advocates for women’s rights, and social justice fighters. You would have known that she comes from a long line of strong black women, who don’t mince words, who are intelligent, media personalities and writers; and you would have known that we will come for you.
Bet you know now. Hindsight is f*cking 20/20!
But I digress…
Did you really believe you would have a “sexual relationship” with our 18-year-old baby girl? Did you believe we would allow it? She’s a freshman in college and you are my age! How sick is that? If no one told you yet, I will…you failed in the due diligence department. You failed in the think it through department. You failed in covering your tracks. You probably aren’t very good at your job of policing either; you probably don’t write well and couldn’t chase down a suspect if you had to. Just not smart at all. Had you been smart, I wouldn’t be writing this blog, my grand-daughter wouldn’t have audio clips of your sex-laden proposals and other stories to tell about your visit to her dorm, and you wouldn’t have put yourself out there, with this freshman girl.
But alas, most perverts don’t think things through or weigh the risks accurately. No worries though, something tells me that you will have plenty of time to think things through in the near future.
By the way, I read the FVSU sexual assault policy and found it almost humorous, especially that part about “notifying campus police in the event of an alleged on-campus sexual assault…and all members of the university community are directed to immediately notify campus police and file an official report”. Quick question for you and the school administration, “who do the students tell when the perpetrator is the police?”
I also read FVSU student conduct handbook. I like that you aim to hold students accountable for bad behavior. And I read parts of the online employee handbook and I note page 9, and 10 as well as page 59 and 60 in particular, in that employee handbook and that part about “zero tolerance for sexual harassment” and that section on “amorous relationships with students”. I am sure FVSU wrote these rules to be followed. I am sure the school had good intentions when these policies and procedures were drafted. The words certainly sound clear and dramatic.
But alas, men and their dicks.
What I’ve come to know is that men, with their need for sex and power, and their seemingly insatiable lust, will violate rules, risk freedom, and take chances that will ruin not only their careers, but their marriages, and the lives of women, just to get some “ass” (aka sex); and to catch their next prey. It’s a proven historical fact.
I’ve seen all this before. As an attractive woman, who was also a fully developed girl at Nya’s age, I too have been the victim of inappropriate touching, inappropriate comments and sexual advances by men of all ages, that started when I was a girl, and has continued all throughout my adult life. My employment life was no different. Too many women have that story. I know sexual harassment and perverts all too well. It’s men just like you, who are in all of our stories.
So here we are.
And just to put you on notice: Before you and your comrades get too slick, I want to let you know that I am a prior law enforcement officer with California Department of Corrections. I started as a Correctional Officer and worked my way up to Correctional Captain, Chief of Background Investigations. I understand law enforcement roles and boundaries. I understand the culture and “blue(or green) walls of silence”. I understand false reporting and abuses of power more than most. So we will be watching how your agency handles it.
I am also a “woke” black woman. I am in tuned to the world. I see how Black bodies are treated. I am aware that black women subjected to sexual violence and even death, are too often, invisible. I see how injustices are carried out on Black bodies with little to no accountability. Trust me, this case will be different. I assure you it will.
Your words and actions, reek of perversion. I can’t help but wonder how many other young women have been subject to your sexual advances over the years at FVSU and in your personal life. How many other young impressionable women have you dangled the “I will satisfy you sexually, get your hair done, nails done and take you places” carrot, who actually took the bait? This isn’t your first rodeo. Predators don’t start at this late stage of life. I would be surprised if you aren’t another unhappily married pig with a long list of victims.
Unfortunately for you, this is a time in American history where women no longer have to hide, or live in fear of speaking up about sexual harassment, abuse, or molestation, out of intimidation or threat. You picked the wrong 18-year-old, wrong family and wrong era.
Too bad for you and FVSU, between my daughter and I, we have over 30,000 social media followers. Add to that, we have experience working with the media, writing and video making skills and we have “A” list connections. Clearly, you mistook my grand-daughter for a young needy, broken, black child without a strong family behind her, or you simply let your penis and deranged sexual mind, do the thinking for you, it was a terrible lapse in judgment on your part. Next time, you will think before you act.
Let this serve as a reminder to all men who think with their penis instead of their brains. You might want to count to 1000, list all of the possible ramifications of your actions, then ask yourself if it’s worth it. But anyway, it just got real! Shame on you! And shame on FVSU! The chickens have come home to roost.
29 thoughts on “An Open Letter to the Ft. Valley State University Lieutenant who Thrust My Freshman College Student Grand-daughter into the #MeToo Movement: Time is Up”
Like u said he picked the wrong vulnerable teenage girl…. it will be real interesting how this plays out !!!!!
Exactly! He should have done his due diligence and thought it through. Men, too often, just don’t think it through. He will be sorry this time. He didn’t know who we were.
Dear MS. Frost.you are a very well spoken young woman, and a great writer. You were probably asked not to reveal that dog of a man’s name .but animals like this one. should be exposed to the world for all to see exactly who they are, the Bible speaks of wickedness. sitting in high places.and you just dropped the mic on one of them, there’s a lot that I can say on this kind of thing ,I’m going to cut through the chase .so please. No matter how rough this might get. Please don’t back down the kind of man you are dealing with. is the kind that will throw rocks at the glass house to destroy it. Then hide his hand. and deny it, so please tell the young lady to stay strong. Stand tall. and never back down, thirty plus yrs ago. I did. and right today. I’m still sorry for not fighting through it, anyway you keep on fighting for what’s right, be blessed soldiers and stay on the battlefield. because this is (WAR),
Well said… I know you and Shanae will stay vigilant in this matter. I am sorry this happened to your granddaughter.
This is so disgusting,ju ju to think you are entrusting your children with people whose intentions aren’t genuine.
I stand behind everything you said , Ms. Frost
and will gladly support you in any way , in your
fight for justice . Get a lawyer , ask for dismissal of him from his job , a letter of
apology , and , a monetary settlement .
The same thing happened to me when I went there. I’m 42 years old now. Apparently Campus police have not changed at all. I’m glad that you all are standing up and speaking out.
Booknerd… would you be willing to chat with me? I am on the legal team on this current case.
Hello again, we have a lawyer and several other girls and women have come forward. The lawyers want to know if you or anyone you know who has suffered from him are willing to come forward. Send me a message or respond here.
Black men are being punished by God for the very thing society has fooled them to believe is their asset. I’m pleased that God exposes evil in due time. The time is now. I hope after this is all over you will keep your asset in your bedroom with your wife.
Ms. Frost nothing else need to be said you read him his rights. I can’t stand perverted men. Jesus
As a 55 yr old white guy, I say “get him”.
NO excuse for this nonsense. And I agree; certainly NOT his first time.
Thank you Mark! I really appreciate that. Nope, not his first time. I am sure of that! But it may be his last!
Very well-written! I too, will be waiting for justice to be served.
My hat goes out to u Ms Frost well said wrong is wrong I would feel the same way if it was one of my granddaughters
This has gone on for far too long.Hope the college will do everything to stop it now that it’s out.Im so sorry your grand daughter had to endure this.Doesnt say anything good for Fort Valley if they don’t stand up!!!
He’s always been an crooked cop..Lock his ass up he deserves it
Tariq.. would you be willing to chat with me? I am on the legal team for this case.
Thank you for doing this! I have an 17 yr. old granddaughter and I think I might hurt a sick perverted man if it happened to her. Sad thing is I’m sure it will in her lifetime. I’m 56 yrs. old and have put up with the abuse of men most of life. (In the work place and personal life). Tell your granddaughter to stand tall and my prayers are with y’all.
Hi Sue, thank you for commenting. Women all over are reaching out. This resonated for reasons I understand. Most women have been through so much and suffered so much at the hands of men who have no boundaries at work and in real life. This hurt me and pissed me off so bad that I had to do something. Women are stepping forward to tell their stories. I had to write it! I appreciate you stopping by and sharing your thoughts.
You have spoken your peace, you have said how you feel and it is well much respected. But there is blame from both parties. Everybody has their opinion as to why this or why that. Yes she is young and yes he is older but both are of age, why didn’t she say no, how did he get her number, why did he feel comfortable with having private conversation? Then again as a Alumni why did he pursue her, why didn’t he understand the policy on student employee relations? Would it be a different story if he wasn’t an officer on campus? Lots of accusations lots of unknown answers and half stories. This is not just about women rights because women have become very vocal over the years but this situation is deeper than that.
I cannot fathom the depth of your anger, fear, and frustration. While you were delightfully eloquent in this letter, I can only assume that you showed your audience just a glimpse into the depth of your emotions. As a middle aged woman, a veteran of the military, and degreed in Criminal Justice – I agree that now is the era of women’s empowerment. I too have been subjected to unwanted sexual advances, and each time I was left feeling afraid and unclean. Therefore, knowing first hand these negative feelings, I pray you take that “man” and drag him and his name through the mud. No woman, let alone a child, should ever have to feel afraid at the hands of those who were entrusted to protect her.
God be with you. God bless you. You will have my continued prayers for success and healing.
Thank you Kate for the kind words and taking a moment to comment and show support. There are no words to describe how it felt hearing it from my granddaughter. I simply couldn’t believe it. None of it makes any sense. But we will stand and we will fight.
Sadly, almost every woman I know has a story about this on some level. We’ve had enough! No more! #timesup
Abuse of power is intolerable.He should be fired and lose his retirement. Hopefully they will make an example of him. Prayers for your grand daughter.
Your writing is a delight to read. Please, please, PLEASE keep us posted!
Thank you for reading and for taking the time to comment. It has been quite an ordeal. I appreciate the kindness.
He was arrested two weeks ago. Other girls and women have come forward. The case moves forward. We will fight til justice is served. Google it!